The bottom line of this perhaps rather long narrative, is not, as I initially started out as a perhaps green, green badge cab driver, who did not move to the valley of Diesel “Ilford” with the obligatory new cab, wife, mortgage and two kids.

No one more surprised than I at the realisation of what has materialised, a first hand description humiliation and deprivation of the British working class from the 1930's.

This erosion brought about entirely by deliberate policy of successive governments.. and the ten draconian years of Tony Blair who deliberately, for whatever reason, encouraged the influx of irrepresible waves of the World's disenchanted onto these shores, by doing so, creating a powerful, intimidating, devisive weapon against the indigenous labouring masses and a hard core of … crime, poverty and unemployment… the triple iron fist of all governments,plus Enron, 9/11, Afghan conflict over oil, Kosovo all emphatically used by Blair; any outcry was by "politically incorrect racists" as Dr David Kelly was to find to the cost of his life.

The differential between rich and poor, is greater now, than during the Middle Ages.

June, 11th; 1977

Still alive

Can only say that which I said a decade ago... Nothing changes.

Other people have changed. They have gone forward, gone backwards...Suddenly aged, suddenly died.

Jenny has changed, Mark also.

I? I am still the same, still bravely going nowhere, still stoutly hoping... a Mr. Micawber ... that something will turn up. Nothing ever does or ever will.
I have vague ideas, and that is all.
I am forty eight.
Still have my own teeth, slight deficiency in the eyesight, weigh 80 kilos. Still suffer with my chest.
I am living in a contracting sphere, have completely failed in every segment of my existence.
All there is to have, is regrets, overcoming this is so exhausting that I am unable to find energy to do anything positive.

Other people, looking at me, appear peeved at my 'Good Life'; on the face of it, it is so. But nothing more than 'Appearance and Reality' - the Greeks knew all about that BC

Perhaps what matters is what I know, their attitudes and mine, on different planets. Completely amazed at other people's way of living... without any apparent conflict whatsoever.
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