The bottom line of this perhaps rather long narrative, is not, as I initially started out as a perhaps green, green badge cab driver, who did not move to the valley of Diesel “Ilford” with the obligatory new cab, wife, mortgage and two kids.

No one more surprised than I at the realisation of what has materialised, a first hand description humiliation and deprivation of the British working class from the 1930's.

This erosion brought about entirely by deliberate policy of successive governments.. and the ten draconian years of Tony Blair who deliberately, for whatever reason, encouraged the influx of irrepresible waves of the World's disenchanted onto these shores, by doing so, creating a powerful, intimidating, devisive weapon against the indigenous labouring masses and a hard core of … crime, poverty and unemployment… the triple iron fist of all governments,plus Enron, 9/11, Afghan conflict over oil, Kosovo all emphatically used by Blair; any outcry was by "politically incorrect racists" as Dr David Kelly was to find to the cost of his life.

The differential between rich and poor, is greater now, than during the Middle Ages.

Dana

Wednesday, 31st January, 2001. 10.a.m.

There has been a lull in the proceedings since that meeting with Aura, I have continued to exist, a comfortable existence, Very few words coming into my head , mostly struggling with the past, perhaps just another sign of living too long.. tend to live in the past quite a lot, then it is nothing new with me.. look backwards, in fact, not only do I look backwards, think backwards. I write backwards, this aspect perfectly apparent to anyone who has held on to these words for so very long, all five books. You need a medal for persistence… sheer bloody mindedness.

As myself , possibly hanging on, waiting to see what will happen to the old man. I, hanging on for that one reason only , refusing to take the last exit, why should I subject myself to more pain..? have had more than my share. What will happen ? what can happen? As reiterated in the past , as reiterated so many times, most of my friends are dead, those who have not been released have suffered some quite bad experiences.

Aura not shown since that last night, described above, I no longer expect to see her, other than by accident, to meet her, other than by accident, as with AndreeA in the Unirii Metro.. that so brief encounter.. our last.. apparently a lifetime ago.

During the last couple of weeks I have , shall we say, attempted to "replace" Aura, with a young lady, twenty one years old, who reminds me somewhat, of a taxi which will not start.


Looking at her, as most of the others, one would think . 'Oh yes! quite attractive!!" , when you lift up the bonnet and look in the brain box, find all manner of things wrong, which need repairing, need time, need patience and invariably, need money.

Usual story.. the "boy friend.." a soldier, in this particular case, with her five years ..went away and married someone else, after one month changed his mind and wanted the original filly back. The inevitable repercussions of that, swore to herself she would not have sex for one year as a punishment , hardly know whom for ..only herself… When Peter dutifully tried, he did not get too far, although there was no resistance, still did not get anywhere.. if that makes sense.. think about it. . Another Susan, another Aura , who more twisted up than she ? so much work straightening her out. Always find the mental cripples, cripples in the brain box, or they find me.
Posted by
Labels: ,

Niciun comentariu:

Trimiteți un comentariu

Abonați-vă la: Postare comentarii (Atom)