The bottom line of this perhaps rather long narrative, is not, as I initially started out as a perhaps green, green badge cab driver, who did not move to the valley of Diesel “Ilford” with the obligatory new cab, wife, mortgage and two kids.

No one more surprised than I at the realisation of what has materialised, a first hand description humiliation and deprivation of the British working class from the 1930's.

This erosion brought about entirely by deliberate policy of successive governments.. and the ten draconian years of Tony Blair who deliberately, for whatever reason, encouraged the influx of irrepresible waves of the World's disenchanted onto these shores, by doing so, creating a powerful, intimidating, devisive weapon against the indigenous labouring masses and a hard core of … crime, poverty and unemployment… the triple iron fist of all governments,plus Enron, 9/11, Afghan conflict over oil, Kosovo all emphatically used by Blair; any outcry was by "politically incorrect racists" as Dr David Kelly was to find to the cost of his life.

The differential between rich and poor, is greater now, than during the Middle Ages.

2 a.m. Thursday. 9th February 1978.

Much has happened since the last effort back in '77.

Carmen has gone and for the truth, I am more conscious of my own protracted loneliness, more aware of my complete loss of touch with reality, no longer consider it worthwhile to discuss the relevance as to whether I am in any way 'happy' for want of a more appropriate word.

There is no lack of clarity in my mind over my relationship with Carmen. Her going left another hole in my existence ... more content in those few months than had been for the last few ragged years, now it has passed ... for ever? hardly know.

Now in a curious position. Jennifer, no longer the person I used to know, reaching the stage where I am unable to sleep and having the distinct impression of having lost all contact with her. If she realises this, then she is not saying, grown deeper as time disappears into oblivion. Perhaps I am making all too much of what after all could simply be the phasing out of whatever once transpired between us. In two days time she will be off for a trip to Vancouver.

At the moment she is staying at the Dorchester Hotel, Park Lane, with Mark. Saw them both coming out with this geyser, climbing into a limousine, while I sat on the rank waiting for a punter ... such are the twists of time and fate. To my knowledge not a muscle in my body moved at this tender scene...

Yet the worm is slowly turning, decided to go off to Naples and see Carmen. Will wait until Jennifer puts in an appearance at the flat, wait until she feels she has the temerity to ask me to baby-sit for a couple of weeks, then I will say No and toddle off to Italy, leaving her to look at the fireplace, the television and Mark; she will not take kindly to that.

For myself, Naples will be something of an event, curious that the first time I touched European soil all those years ago was in Naples.
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